This Thing Called Parenting.

23 Jul

Parents: don’t toddle and drive.


Baby bear is almost two. TWO! I can’t believe it. Here are some lessons I’ve learned along the way:

  • Yo, I’mma let you finish cryin’ in a minute. Right after I give you a little hug, kiss your soft little cheek, and then put you back down to just work through it. Because those toddler temper tantrums are a phase, and I don’t need to get all worked up into a tizzy over them. You will cry, get over it, and the world will again land on it’s axis and continue rotating.
  • I am not cut out to be a line cook. Meaning, I’m not up for cooking you 16 different options at dinner, whipped up in rapid succession, because you won’t eat the first 15 things I try to feed you. If you don’t want what I make, that’s ok – I won’t take it personally, and you’ll live too.
  • There’s nothing cuter than when you tag a “y” onto the end of every word. Like “huggy.” And “trucky.” And “farty.” And assuming you won’t be doing this when you’re 14, I’m going to enjoy it now and not correct you.
  • I finally understand why people leash their toddlers. I’m still not certain I could pull this off myself, but man, do I understand why parents do it. If I blink, you’re off running. This could mean into oncoming traffic, in a grocery store, anywhere really. I literally can’t take my eyes off you for a second or you’re outta here. It’s very stressful, made more so by the fact that you don’t answer when I call your name. D’oh! Double wham.
  • The art of putting together an activity bag, part 1. You are such a little person. Yet you require SO. MANY. TOYS. and things to keep you occupied. If we leave the house for an hour, and there’s going to be a stop at any type of food establishment, I have to have on hand no fewer than: 4 toy cars, 2 books, 1 coloring book (and crayons), 6 snacks, 1 iPhone pre-loaded with kiddie apps, and a puzzle of some sort. Yes, this is what I go to Panera armed with.
  • The art of putting together an activity bag, part 2. Inevitably, without fail, I’ve ALWAYS forgotten the one car/truck/plane/train that you really want to play with. Because I’m a moron.
  • Parenting is not for the weak. It’s really not. You have to have a thick skin for this job. I am the one who always takes care of the booboos, I’m the one who reads you 3 bedtime stories each night. I’m the one who suffered months of pain and healing after a traumatic labor. And yet who do you want a “huggy” from? Who do you want to see at the end of the day? Daddy. Not that daddy doesn’t do an amazing job of being daddy. But seriously, kiddo. You’re breaking my heart… can’t I get a huggy first one of these days? Puuhhhlease?
  • Don’t ever take a two-year old anywhere expensive. This includes museums or amusement parks with high ticket prices, as well as restaurants, vacations, or shows. Because if you do, I can almost guarantee that they will choose that moment to pitch a fit/fall asleep/act a fool.

What lessons have you learned in this thing called parenting? Please share!


2 Responses to “This Thing Called Parenting.”

  1. stace8383 July 23, 2012 at 7:29 pm #

    I think I have learned to relax about stuff… it’s a theoretical lesson, and I’m not always able to apply it practically, but… like you said, they’re going to throw their tantrums, and they’ll get over it, and it isn’t worth getting into a tizz over it! They’re going to refuse their dinner, fine, they can go to bed hungry. But my main lesson from parenting is just to do what seems right and what works for you and your kids! Books and experts don’t know you. 😛

  2. Ellen S. July 24, 2012 at 1:25 pm #

    I have a 21 month old, so I suspect the tantrums haven’t started in full force yet. (bracing myself). For me, I find the best results, both in good times and in tough, has been to literally get on her level. Don’t sit on the couch or stand over her – for playing or for correcting her behavior. Get on the floor, look her in the eye, see things from her perspective, show her the respect she wants…. and be within easier access for kisses and hugs.

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